ordinary magic & the outfits getting me through december
5-4-3-2-1: outfits, loves, non-shoppables, looks & a recent hyperfixation
“I’m just trying to figure out if the world is actually magic or is everything just a big fat lie?”
My son said this to me on Thursday, and I’ve been thinking about it ever since. Before I explain what he meant, let’s rewind the tape a bit.
I fought the Elf on the Shelf for TEN YEARS! I can barely remember to take my vitamins, let alone move this tiny nightmare of an elf around the house. I have nothing against the Elf—it has never caused me harm. My hesitation comes from the fear that my struggles to remember basic daily tasks might now let my kids down, leading to ultimate feelings of shame.
Last year my daughter came home and, with her big blue eyes, said, “Mommy, why are we the only family without an Elf? What do you think it means? I don’t know what I did wrong.” And freeze: in that moment, Dr. Becky would have had ideas and strategies for how I could process these feelings, stick to my guns, be a strong, sturdy leader, and remain an Elfless household of holiday bliss.
But instead, I caved. I bought it. It even sent a letter to my kids alerting them it would be a tiny bit late because of Target’s shipping delays. They love that thing. It brings them so much joy, and they literally team up together to find it and giggle.
This year I’m not sure who I thought I was, but I purchased an Elf Pet. My son turned it over, saw “MADE IN ATLANTA,” and looked at me like he had just cracked a major conspiracy. Honestly, It’s been a long time coming.
After his curiosity got the best of him, I told him the truth. We chatted about the Elf being the work of Mom and Santa being the work of all the people who love him. He had a little tear in his eye but understood.
This was the moment I’d been dreading—the unraveling of childhood magic. And then he said it, “I’m not sure if the world is actually magic or is everything just a big fat lie?” I told him the magic in our world isn’t from an Elf, a tooth fairy, a leprechaun, or a big guy in a red suit. Magic is in the simple moments of life that we often overlook. Together we came up with a list of ordinary things that feel like magic.
1. Looking back: Flipping through old photos or watching videos from when you were a baby.
2. Family time: Sitting with parents or grandparents, feeling the comfort of connection.
3. Weekend rituals: French toast breakfasts that make Saturday mornings feel special.
4. Shared laughter: That moment when everyone in the room laughs at the same time.
5. Moon magic: Pausing to notice the craters on the moon and feeling a quiet sense of awe.
6. Music that moves you: Listening to a song that instantly lifts your mood.1
7. Cooking together: Baking with someone and enjoying the simple rhythm of creating.
8. Moments of wonder: Watching fireworks light up the sky.
9. Mini victories: Finishing a book, folding laundry, winning at Bop-It, or writing a paragraph—small wins that matter.
10. Acts of kindness: Helping someone in a tiny way, just because you can.
That night, before he went to bed, he said, “Thank you and Dad for all the gifts you’ve gotten me over the years.”
After that, my worries about ruining the moment, traumatizing him, or lying to him all these years began to drift away.
At last, after all the soul-searching, I was ready for something lighter — so let’s dive into the fun stuff.
What’s Inside: Here’s our gameplan for today’s post - a 5-4-3-2-1 countdown, you know the drill!
👗5 recent outfits
🎅🏻4 things Santa can skip
🫶🏻3 can’t-cart joys
👕2 outfits styled
🖼️1 hyperfixation
Every time I wear a blazer to school, someone asks if I’m going on an interview, lol. I love this old houndstooth blazer—it’s oversized, incredibly warm, and hasn’t let me down in years.
Dressing up leggings for work is my new super flex. Still loving these stirrup leggings and dug this old blouse out of my closet! Alex DiCapo Patel declared that pussy bows are VERY cool—so consider this my new personality.
Closest I could get to wearing pajamas to work—and I’m here for it. I love how the cream, burgundy, and brown tones flow together!
4. Possibly an unpopular opinion, but I passionately love H&M knits. I’ve had this one for 6+ years, and somehow it hasn’t gone up in flames.
Snagged this Ralph Lauren button-down secondhand (men’s medium) and finally let her see daylight. The jeans are also secondhand (look at me!) It was subarctic (40 degress, lol) so I added the grey cardi as a warming agent.
Four things Santa doesn’t need to bring to my house because I already bought them, tested them, and LOVE them.
1. HOT CHOCOLATE - I don’t know why this tastes superior to everything else I’ve tried2, but I know in my heart it’s worth every penny. One year I got this hot cocoa from a student paired with a cute mug and marshmallows. A+ gifting!
2. HEAT PROTECTANT SPRAY - Recommended by my Gen-Z hairdresser, and I love it. I apply it to dry hair before heat—it doesn’t make my hair greasy, leaves it smooth, and smells divine.
3. PUP DISH TOWEL - I bought this last year as a gift to myself. I love it so much, I won’t let anyone touch it with dirty hands in the kitchen. This may defeat the purpose, but PUPS > EVERYONE
4. HAND CREAM - Dry hands in the winter are 0% fun. A colleague gave me this as a gift, and I love how luxe and moisturizing it feels. My nails may rarely be painted, but my hands shall be moisturized.
1. ATTEND A COMMUNITY EVENT - The Famjam and I participated in our local Holiday 5K. This is truly my mom’s Super Bowl, so we were happy to participate! There’s something really cool about seeing your community come together to benefit our local health and wellness non-profit.
2. COZY AMBIENCE - I usually put a random YouTube ambience on my smart board at school to create what I call the “zen garden” in my HS classroom. The students will never admit it, but they love it. I also love putting them on at home while I’m cleaning, reading, or playing a board game. Just go to YouTube and type in ___ ambience (fill in the blank with whatever you’re looking for: holiday lake, Hogwarts Christmas, cozy cafe, etc.). Here are some favorites: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5
3. MOOD BOARDING - Instead of spending and shopping, might I interest you in moodboarding? It saved me this week from buying yet another faux fur coat. This isn’t something new, but it’s definitely new for me. The purpose of moodboarding is to visually map out a vibe, idea, or direction before you commit to anything. I’ve been having a lot of fun setting an intention and gathering a variety of things I love. I made this one for a future renovation I’m considering!
Here are two outfits styled from my own closet! Most pieces were bought with my own moola. If you see a ^, it means I substituted something similar to what I own that’s no longer in stock/available.
LOOK 1
A nice cozy yet elevated look to wear to an outdoor tree-lighting! The red sweater can be worn over the brown coat on your shoulders.
LOOK 2
I dress a bit more casual to work than those in corporate America. I love a black-wash jean to take the place of trousers. An oversized turtleneck sweater is always a closet workhorse. Mix some metals with the gold huggies and silver ring!
I am really into picture frames without pictures in them. Before you chalk me up as a heartless, soulless weirdo3, I don’t mean blank frames. I love the idea of filling them with little nostalgic bits: a receipt, a concert ticket, playing cards, a fortune cookie message, a key—whatever sparks something.
As we get ready to start construction, I’m starting to dream up design ideas that will give our home more unique character!
💬Sound Off: What’s a tiny moment that feels like magic to you? What small accents in your home give it character? And… what would happen if I set the Elf on the Shelf on fire (kidding… mostly)?
That’s all for today. As always thank you beyond words for being here! I appreciate you x infinity + 1!
May your hot chocolate be perfect, your laughter contagious, & your small wins feel just like magic xo,
If this made you smile, hit the heart, re-stack it, or share it—those tiny taps make a HUGE difference. 🫶🏻
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How many times is too many times to listen to I’ve Seen It by Olivia Dean? Asking for a friend… (me).
Bold and polarizing statement - but it’s better than Serendipity Don’t @ me.
Unrelated but related—I lowkey love being called weird.
Last year I talked to my now 13y/o about how he now gets to BE a part of the Christmas magic for his little sister and everyone he loves. It was such a sweet moment, and he's done so beautifully. The magic changes, but it never ends!
The Santa convo is so so hard. I’ve always felt bad that I was lying but also felt so strongly that the magic is so so so so so magical!! That Christmas morning feeling. I know he still feels it, just in a different way.
Also love mood boarding, legit how I managed to pick out 1 million light fixtures in the new house. There should be a plaque that says House brought to you by Canva.